motivational monday

Monday, January 30, 2012

My main goal in life is to find my own brand of happiness, and that spills over into the need to be happy in my career as well. That lovely picture up above really made me smile. I have been quite scared thinking that somewhere along the way I am going to have to settle for a job or career that I hate, that isn't me, that's all boring beige walls and selling things. It's nice to be reminded that I actually have a choice in the matter. That I can refuse to be something that I don't want to be.

I think that too often we associate "being an adult" with the bitter taste of just accepting life as is. We've grown accustomed to taking a mouthful too much of life's dreadful brew, realizing it's missing a few teaspoons of sugar and a load of flavor, and swallowing it with a smile because that's how we are brought up; our futures are bound to be unhappy, boring and distasteful. Told that we should just go through the motions just because that's what we do as adults: go to college, get a job, get married, have a kid, be miserable, retire, die. That's not a life to me. How is that living when you die unhappy? How is that living when you are just accepting it and not doing anything for you?

Personally, I've spent years smiling on the outside, taking the helpings of whatever life throws on my plate, and finishing off the leftovers, while all in all expecting it to pay off in a buffet (was that a touch too far into the philosophical food analogies? ;) ). Somewhere along the way I expected that if I keep dealing with things and not fighting back that, eventually, I would get what I want, what I deserve. Unfortunately, 99.9% of the time that is not the case, mostly due to the fact that life just is not fair.

Despite what we are told, I think that a big part of growing up is being able to calmly send back the bitter coffee cup of life and get it done right. I think that it's spitting out the food. I think it's refusing to accept anything that isn't good for you. I think it is refusing to be absolutely bored to death, taken advantage of, or settling on anything less than worthy of your happiness.

As for me, I'm not exactly the wise elder I thought I would be by now. I clearly don't have the answers, but I'm beginning to catch on, with my first step being to send the plate back to the kitchen or just refusing it altogether. Here's to accepting only the nasty taste in my mouth left behind by bad people and things I quickly got rid of. I don't care how foolish I look, how many times I fall tripping over the messes I will make, or what it takes to build up the courage to do so, I will make it a habit to remind myself that I have the choice to accept or deny something, to settle or not to settle. And I'm just not settling.

Here's to remembering that you have the ability to choose, in every situation, no matter what. Here's to refusing to be boring. Because you chose it. You broke your butt. You stuck to your guns. You decided that, for once, you weren't going to accept the beige walls, the nasty people, the insecurity, the defeat. Here's to the world really, truly being yours.

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