motivational monday: hang in there!

Monday, September 26, 2011

My sister & I always had this theory that every 2 years or so it is just an awful, horrible, painful year. 2011 has just been one of those years. I've been betrayed, lied to, lost things in my life that meant so much, cried, yelled, fought, been used, disrespected... the list goes on. Lots and lots of crying have occurred since the beginning of the year and, recently I've been feeling so tired of everything- of the fighting, of the want for things to just be ok, of life. It's as if I'm hanging from the tallest building in the world by a string in the middle of a hurricane; virtually helpless in the middle of a disaster. Um, check please?

At my job I set up cards and there's this one $.99 card that always gets me. It's a cat mid-meow, looking more than a little unhappy/frightened, and literally holding onto its owner because it's seconds away from falling. On the inside it, quite adorably & cornily states "hang in there." It puts a smile on my face every time. I just so happened to run into something quite fabulous on the web entitled the same thing. And it got me thinking...

I've also done some amazing things and had some amazing experiences this year. How many 20 year olds can say that they've been to Italy twice? Let alone play house in another country with their boyfriend for a month. How many people can say that they've won a kate spade cosmetic bag? Having the option of going to New York City whenever they want? How many people can say they figured out what they actually may enjoy doing for the rest of their life? How many people can say they fought to pay to finish to college, and are halfway through winning the battle? Have amazing best friends and boyfriend who love me for me? Are doing something with their life? Showing the world that they are more than what they are destined to be? Driving? Walking? Breathing? Somewhere along the way we all tend to forget what little, good things we have because we are too busy looking at what everyone else has, or spending time wanting to future to get here instead of enjoying the little sunshine we have right now. Or maybe there is just so much overabundance of crap that we can't see the sunshine poking through anymore.

I'm not going to lie, it's easier said than done; the "right now" in my life is hard. There's veerry little sunshine and the amount of crap on my plate is just piling up. The balancing act I have going on is also no picnic. I miss the stress free days in Italy where I could sit down and read a book and not worry about today or tomorrow or my family or friends. I miss sleep. I miss not having a care in the world. But, most of all, I miss the calm...

& not having this load of crap on my shoulders!

Yes, I can live without the drama and I'd gladly give away all of my sorrow to an artist, a movie producer, or anyone who would bear it, but who would we be without it? Would we value that one day of sunshine if it never rained? Of running into a friend if we saw them all the time? Or value the true people who love you if there weren't people who didn't? But where would we all be without a little chaos? What would we talk about over coffee with our friends if everything was right as rain ALL THE TIME? What would we complain about on Facebook? It wouldn't make for such a great story, and it probably wouldn't make for such a great life, and maybe you wouldn't be such a good person if it were otherwise. I would gladly settle for a boring, happy life any day, but we're just not in control of that. So why not give ourselves something we CAN control-- like how we look at the situation & react.

And I get it, bad days are like rainy days-- there are far too many, they take forever to get to sunshine, and, in abundance are, by far, detrimental to your health (& make everything 20 times worse than it is). But, if there's one thing you, & I need to do, is, just like that $.99 cat card, HANG IN THERE. Yes, you may be scared out of your mind, unhappy, weak, tired, and just done. WITH EVERYTHING. & Most of the time it sucks, really, REALLY bad, but you have to have hope. Hope that after all of this mess, after the storm, that you'll be better from it all, that there will be sunshine. Life is just the weatherman, what's your forecast going to be? Rainy, depressing, and sad, with a side of FML or rainy with a chance of moderate sunshine due to refusing to give in? That part is entirely up to you.

In all honesty, if life threw lemons at me I would probably throw them back, beat the hell out of life, & then make it watch me chainsaw down the damn tree. In this case, however, without the luxury of that option, I say, take that damn lemon & make lemonade. But you can't exactly make very good lemonade without lemons and sugar. Whether you like it or not, there's always going to be good & bad, your horrible, want to crawl into a hole and die days (& weeks), & your I'M ON TOP OF THE FREAKING WOOOORLD *squeeeeee* days (& months). You CAN get to those days. You CAN be happy. And, most importantly, YOU ARE STRONG. If you've kicked life's ass before you can do it again. & if you've never shown life who's boss, it won't even see you coming!

Now grab hold of that flimsy little string for dear life, look that hurricane in the face, & announce to the the world that you are stronger than anything it can throw at you- stronger than the fastballs, the drama, and whatever else it feels like dishing out, you are going to kick ass, take names, & fight your way to your through that storm. Don't give up, don't give in, & even when you're seconds away from putting up the white flag, hang in there! Find that silver lining, those itty bitty rays of sunshine peeking through the storm clouds and rain, and remember what you do have, & most importantly, that one asset you never lose: strength.

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